You keep doing this thing where you write something awesome, go away for a little while, tinker with it, and then bring it back even more awesome than what you started with, and it's killing me. I read the draft and I thought this is so good, so so good, but I can handle it, I know what's going to be happen, I can be cool and give a proper review- and then I read it again and all I want to do is squeal like a little girl, because you've changed it in these tiny little ways and managed to make it about a million times more in depth, and you build this amazing, incredible world with every single sentence.
They way you describe things is just so... so... so. I can't even come up with a way to explain it; I could nigh-on smell that terrible reek of evil that Kyle Rondart had, feel the sun on my back in Fai's garden and the chill fear in my belly when Kuro-wolf was chasing that... thing through the forest.
I also love the little things you've put in there about Fai knowing his little sister is a woman now, and a woman in love, and his insecurities as her big brother- and how that ties neatly into how he feels about his puppy. Guh. I can't wait to see how you develop this plot and their relationship...
Doumeki was win. Simple as that.
I'm so in love with this story I want to marry it, I want to elope with it, I want to take it to dinner and seduce it slowly over a bottle of really good wine and some excellent and ridiculously expensive chocolate dessert.
no subject
You keep doing this thing where you write something awesome, go away for a little while, tinker with it, and then bring it back even more awesome than what you started with, and it's killing me. I read the draft and I thought this is so good, so so good, but I can handle it, I know what's going to be happen, I can be cool and give a proper review- and then I read it again and all I want to do is squeal like a little girl, because you've changed it in these tiny little ways and managed to make it about a million times more in depth, and you build this amazing, incredible world with every single sentence.
They way you describe things is just so... so... so. I can't even come up with a way to explain it; I could nigh-on smell that terrible reek of evil that Kyle Rondart had, feel the sun on my back in Fai's garden and the chill fear in my belly when Kuro-wolf was chasing that... thing through the forest.
I also love the little things you've put in there about Fai knowing his little sister is a woman now, and a woman in love, and his insecurities as her big brother- and how that ties neatly into how he feels about his puppy. Guh. I can't wait to see how you develop this plot and their relationship...
Doumeki was win. Simple as that.
I'm so in love with this story I want to marry it, I want to elope with it, I want to take it to dinner and seduce it slowly over a bottle of really good wine and some excellent and ridiculously expensive chocolate dessert.
Thank you for the new chapter. ♥